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"Sit tight, here comes the story"
“I am not happy at work. Lately it has been so hard to deliver things that I don’t believe in. I feel that I have to do things that go against my values. I always loved working and now I drag myself out of the bed every day. What is going on with me?” Lila vents with her husband Theo after a long day of work.
“What do you mean? You love your team. You are always talking about them, how creative and awesome they are” Theo tries to be positive about the situation.
“I do love my team. I guess I don’t like where the company is going. I don’t agree with the direction the company is taking”.
“I can definitely see what you mean. I remember you complaining about the layoffs you had to do and how that haunted you for months” - Theo continues - “Do you think it is time to make a change and find a new job?”.
“I don’t know. I only know that I need to do something different. I am not happy at work and it is affecting my overall well being. I am stressed all the time. I don’t have a lot of patience with my kids, and even with my colleagues at work. I am negative when talking to my team. I don’t even recognize myself”- Lila finally acknowledges that she is unhappy and work is the main reason why she feels that way.
“Ok, let’s think this through and make sure you know exactly what is bothering you, so you know what your next steps should be” - Theo encourages her to dig deeper on her dissatisfaction with work.
“You are right. I think the book I read about Ikigai really touched my heart and I might not be living my purpose, that’s why I feel this way. I really love social justice, equality, and advocacy and I don’t feel I am being able to exercise fairness in the current environment I am in right now”.
The conversation continues about what Ikigai really is and how Theo also needs to find his own Ikigai.
Let's talk about this:
"Ikigai" is a Japanese concept that roughly translates to "a reason for being" or "a reason to wake up in the morning." It represents finding a sense of purpose, fulfillment, and satisfaction in life by identifying and pursuing what brings joy, meaning, and fulfillment. It's about discovering and nurturing the activities, relationships, and pursuits that make life worth living.
If we had a formula that would guarantee we wake up every day excited and happy to go to work, to feel safe at work (and at home) and return home fulfilled by the work we do, wouldn’t that be wonderful?
If we understand what is our Ikigai, our purpose in life, we can gain a deeper understanding of how to find meaning, fulfillment, and happiness in our lives. Knowing what our purpose is can provide valuable insights for personal growth, well-being, and life satisfaction. So why not put in the work and find our purpose? Because it is hard.
What is my purpose in life? Such a simple question but so hard to answer. Everyone has a purpose. While some individuals may have a clear sense of direction, for others, defining their life purpose can feel frustrating because it may not seem so obvious or we haven’t yet made it conscious. For the latter group, remember you have an entire lifetime to find your passions. We can start by investigating within ourselves, going really deep into our experiences, background, stories and situations we’ve lived in to find it. There are patterns in our stories and if we really dig, we can find what really motivates us and inspires us.
It has taken me years to hone in on what I believe my purpose in life to be. Perhaps it's a result of my current age or life stage, but for the past few years, I've found myself pondering this question more deeply. Activities and pursuits that once brought me fulfillment now seem lacking in meaning. This realization prompted me to embark on a journey of self-discovery in search of my true purpose. It has been a challenging yet rewarding journey, requiring patience and dedication to introspection and growth.
I will share my purpose here with the intention to inspire you to think about your own: “My purpose in life is to inspire and empower others to reach their fullest potential. This is driven by my passion for making a positive difference in people’s lives”. This shows up in my personal and professional lives. Since college, when I graduated as a Speech Therapist, I remember getting home from a long work day feeling tired but fulfilled because I had seen patients entering my office feeling sad and unmotivated by their speech or voice impairment, and they usually left motivated and excited with tools to improve their skills and capabilities that helped them to overcome their issues.
In the corporate world, I thrive as a leader when I witness individuals living their full potential, making a profound impact on both the business and the people they collaborate with. As a friend, nothing brings me greater joy than offering support and lending an empathetic ear to those I care about. In my role as a wife, I cherish the moments when my husband and I engage in heartfelt discussions about our family's collective purpose, leaving us feeling empowered and in control of our choices. As a daughter and sister, I am committed to being a pillar of strength for my loved ones during challenging times and a cheerleader when they share their wins. And through my journey as a blogger, I've discovered a platform to amplify my purpose, allowing me to reach and inspire a multitude of lives.
As for Lila’s situation in the story, she knows her purpose, and she just realized her work environment is going against what she believes. She will need to make a decision. But, if different from Lila, you still are in search of your purpose, don't allow anxiety to hinder your progress; instead, view it as a natural part of the process and a catalyst for growth. Embrace this journey with patience and resilience, knowing that every step towards self-improvement, no matter how small, brings you closer to clarity and fulfillment.
How excellence looks like:
When you are clear about your Ikigai (life purpose) you are empowered to live a more fulfilling, purpose-driven life, where your actions are guided by meaning and intention.
When you have a sense of direction and focus in life, your goals are more meaningful and your decisions are aligned with your values and passions.
When you have a clear purpose, it motivates you to take action and pursue your goals with determination and enthusiasm.
When you have a sense of meaning and fulfillment, this helps you to overcome challenges and persevere in the face of obstacles, building greater resilience.
When you live in alignment with your life purpose, you experience overall well-being and life satisfaction. There is a better sense of fulfillment, contentment, and inner peace, as you know you are living authentically and making a positive impact in the world.
Food for Thought:
"My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style." by Maya Angelou.
Call for action:
Reflect on your values: make time to reflect on your core values, beliefs, and principles. Consider what matters most to you and what you stand for. Your purpose is often closely aligned with your values.
Identify Passions: Think about activities, hobbies, or topics that ignite your enthusiasm and bring you joy. Pay attention to moments when you feel most alive and engaged. These passions can offer clues about where your purpose lies.
Set Meaningful Goals: Set goals that align with your values, passions, and strengths. Define what success looks like to you and what you hope to achieve in the short-term and long-term.
Give Back: Volunteer or engage in acts of service that align with your values and interests. Contributing to causes or organizations that are meaningful to you can provide a sense of fulfillment and purpose.
Resources:
Finding your North-star - BetterUp article about how to find purpose in life - they offer very detailed actions to start your journey.
What is the purpose of your purpose? - Harvard Business Review article about how to find purpose in business
Start with Why and Finding your why - Simon Sinek books about finding your WHY (purpose) in life and business
Ikigai - this book goes into how knowing you Ikigai can increase longevity
Perfect timing on this topic! This is one that resonates strongly for me. Sometimes trying to answer 'what is your PURPOSE in life' can be so daunting, and it's easier to just keep on tackling life's day-to-day demands. But we owe it to ourselves to seek this out and your tip of starting with your values makes it less daunting since it is often clearer and easier to see what are those.
ReplyDeleteAgreed! Also, it can be intimidating to ask us the question, because it put a pressure on finding an answer :) Hope the suggestions to start small is helpful to start the process.
ReplyDelete